And I would love for Carrie Underwood to accompany me to dinner tonight.
We are clearly in an era where quarterbacks feel that it's a rite of passage to demand something so seemingly unrealistic that articles covering said demands seem to be something akin to what the satire site The Onion runs.
The newest member of this less-than-exclusive club is none other than New York Giants quarterback Eli Manning, who is apparently telling his team that he wants to be the highest-paid player in the NFL.
If these absurd salary demands are met, Manning's next contract would earn him over $22 million annually with guarantees north of the $65 million Philip Rivers agreed to on his new deal this past weekend. Considering Manning's age, his demands are likely five years at $110 million with $70 million guaranteed.
Remember the term "absurd," because it keeps popping into my mind here.
The argument Manning can make is that the's earned two Super Bowl rings—a number that ranks him second among active quarterbacks in a tie with Ben Roethlisberger, and right behind Tom Brady.
It's that whole "quarterback wins" stat that people love throwing out there.
Speaking of quarterback wins. While Manning did put up the best single-season performance of his career last year, the Giants are 22-26 since the team won the Super Bowl back in January of 2012. In the "what have you done for me recently category," Manning doesn't even have that to fall back on.
In no way is this an indication that he doesn't deserve to get paid. But to indicate that he's worth more than the Aaron Rodgers of the world is absurd.
Entering the final year of his contract, Manning is set to make just shy of $20 million this season. He's definitely due another long-term deal. That's not even debatable.